4 weeks behind on the SYL Challenge

As I suspected I am 4 weeks behind on blogging the weekly challenges. 

Oh well, this is my journey and I will do at my pace I guess :)

Today I am working on my 'vision board' (Week 7's challenge) and I am going to incorporate 'gratitude' and also add a few of my favourite things. I am also doing it like a scrapbook page so I can pop it into an album like a little snapshot in time of me now and my dreams for the future. 

SYL Challenge Week 10 - Facing Fears

I can remember during a team building session at work a few years ago, we had to write down qualities we admired in each other. Someone wrote down they thought I was 'fearless'. Now, I wouldn't have describe myself as fearless. A few years ago I would have considered myself as confident, but not fearless. 


Honesty, loyalty and harmony are very important to me. Several years ago something happened at work that rocked my me in a way I would not have thought possible. I was in a management role and I thought I was affiliative,  friendly, fair and relaxed. I found myself wrongly accused of something pretty serious by two vindictive people I thought liked me. It was massive stab in the back. I was investigated (interrogated) and of course cleared but I was then removed from the job I loved and cast away into no mans land to a crap job with no responsibility. I am still working my way back! 


I went from a person who usually felt confident in most situations and around most people, to a person who was totally fearful and totally lacking in confidence. I was afraid to go to work, afraid to go out of the house, afraid to talk to people, depressed, teary, and thinking everyone was looking at me knowing what had happened. I thought my career was over, that I had been stripped of my skills and reputation and I was totally unable to sell myself in any situation. I was unable to let go of the injustice and still can't. It was an extreme response that I still do not fully understand. 


Very slowly after some counselling and the startling realisation that not every one in this world will like me or treat me well, I began baby steps towards regaining a little confidence. I eventually faced some of my fears and returned to work. I still find myself avoiding certain situations and I don't want to do the social thing with people at work. I have only recently stopped slinking to the cafe in fear of bumping into people I once knew, I now walk with confidence and head high. Time, appropriate help and support, people who love and believe me, and a gentle rebuilding of confidence little by little has helped me to face my fears in this situation and I have learned so very much from this dreadful situation. 

SYL Challenge Week 9 - Go easier on yourself

This week's challenge was to 'go easier on yourself'.


This was actually a new years resolution that I haven't really achieved. I wanted to 'go gently' on myself, slow down if I could and not feel guilty if things didn't get done. As someone who is always rushing and on the go, I wanted to try and ease on the brakes and also lessen the expectations I place upon myself to get everything done and lists ticked off. 


When I look around at my family, they don't seem to be running around like headless chooks at full speed and they don't look totally burnt out at the end of the day like I look and feel. What do they do differently? They seem to be able to do one thing at a time, take their time, not notice mess, and they spend good amounts of time doing what they choose or need to do for themselves. 


I on the other hand for some reason feel almost the entire weight of household chores and shopping on my shoulders. Often I find myself doing housework while others sit or sleep or relax. Now we have 2 extra people living here, I seem to be doing more than ever! 


Now I am certainly not a clean freak by any means but I do have some standards. I don't like plates and cups lying around on every surface and piled in the sink. I hate bottle tops and chewed icy-pole sticks on my coffee table or the cats fur in my dinner. Why is it always me loading and unpacking the dishwasher or cooking dinner? Why am I the only one that notices if there are no clean undies or jocks or if there is no bread, milk or dunny paper? Why does no one think of what will be for dinner until they are hungry at 6 or 7pm. Why can't they do things they can see need to be done, or do they just not see it because it isn't important to them? So I find I am constantly multi tasking to get everything done, but instead of this being a good thing, the multi-tasking is actually making me busier! The more I am doing, the more time I have to do more! 


So, my 'go easier' on myself challenge is as simple as that. I am going to lessen the expectations on myself to get everything done and I am going to do a little less. I will not feel guilty if things don't get done because they are not all 'mine' to do. I am going to make sure that each day there is a little time for me to do something for ME just like everyone else does. 


My mantra for this challenge:


'Go gently on myself'

Photo A Day 26 - 29

Photo # 26 - Our front door

Photo # 27 - Sunsets
We love to watch the sunsets from our 'terrace'

Photo # 28 - My chair
This is my lounge chair. It is a shabby old vinyl couch hence the reason it is covered with a blanky. Sitting in my chair at the end of the day to watch a bit of MKR or Prisoner is a simple pleasure. 

Photo # 29 - ME
The last photo for the Photo A Day challenge! 

Photo A Day 23 - 25

Photo #23 - The letterbox

Getting mail these days is a rare thing. Bills come all too frequently but nice mail is a rarity. Jack's GF Shannon is 19 and up until a week ago had never posted a letter before!! Michael's brother works for Aust Post and says most of the mail they process is online shopping these days. Even at Chrissy and Birthday time the snail mail is dwindling. Bring back letters, cards and nice mail I say!

Photo # 24 - My parents

My parents are young and cool grandparents. I don't know what I would do without their help. Mum, Dad and Wendy are always there for Emilie and I and I love them dearly. 

Photo # 25 - Going to the movies

I try to get to the movies as much as I can especially with my usual movie going friend Sam. We have been friends since primary school and over the last 5 year have seen so many films. This pic is of me before seeing 'The Muppets'.